Parents and Discipline.
02-19-2010, 08:32 AM
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02-19-2010, 10:40 AM
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02-19-2010, 11:25 AM
#46
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Or as us white trash would say: u sure do gotta purdy mouth
02-19-2010, 09:02 PM
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02-20-2010, 12:58 AM
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after reading some of the posts, some of them being real sad, about people talking about their past, i can't help but to share my experience as well.
i am also an Asian decent, i got my fair share of beating. my father is a very strict person, i got beaten whenever i got a bad grade, fought with my siblings or did anything that was not appropriate; he also forced me to learn a lot of things from music to sports. When i was a kid, i was afraid of him. He could just literally look at me and make me quiet when i was crying after being scold or beaten. i also don't like how he forced me to learn a lot of things, because that would take away most of my holiday time. however, my mother would always be the person who care and console me after i got beaten. she was the one who let me felt that i am still being loved after i got beaten. she always took time to explain that all my father doings was because he loved me. because of this, i never really hated my dad, but i was still afraid of him.
as i grew up to understand what is right and what is wrong, my father also changed. He is still strict to me, but no more beating was used to discipline us kids. he still scold me at times when i did something wrong, but then i have come to understand that its all for my good. i also come to appreciate all his beating and forcing that he did for me; i even regretted he didn't forced me enough in some of the things, like learning piano and mandarin. this is because i know, if he hadn't forced me, i wouldn't have known how to speak english, how to swim or even how to protect myself. if he hadn't straighten my path, i might not even be the person that i am now.
now that im almost 20, my father has changed and gotten older a lot. he still at times look out and guide me, but he now believes that i know whats the best for myself. even i am now 18000 miles away from home, my parents don't need to monitor me from time to time. although i don't work, i get my own financial freedom. compare to some of my friends need her mom to control him/her financially just to make sure that he/she does not do anything stupid. i am not perfect and i don't claim to be perfect, but i am happy that at least i can make my parents feel proud of me. i also understand that some of you have different experiences with different level of beating from me, and i don't think they are right. but looking at my cousins here, whose parents never beat or even rarely scold them, hold no respect for their parents are just disheartening. therefore, i still have to agree to beating(with no intent to harming) is necessary for parents to discipline their kids, until the point that they know for themselves what is and is not right to do. as for step-parents, its a different story as they are not actually "your" parents.
ps for krozi; i am a currently an undergraduate psych student at ucla, but i have no intention to be a psychologist or psychiatrist myself. it is true that psychologist/psychiatrist is a job with the highest suicide rate, but hey, maybe its because diagnosing a depressed person end up depressing u as well.
also my friend, people don't become psychologist/psychiatrist because they are mentally unstable, it is because they want to help people.
Cheers,
unlimited90
i am also an Asian decent, i got my fair share of beating. my father is a very strict person, i got beaten whenever i got a bad grade, fought with my siblings or did anything that was not appropriate; he also forced me to learn a lot of things from music to sports. When i was a kid, i was afraid of him. He could just literally look at me and make me quiet when i was crying after being scold or beaten. i also don't like how he forced me to learn a lot of things, because that would take away most of my holiday time. however, my mother would always be the person who care and console me after i got beaten. she was the one who let me felt that i am still being loved after i got beaten. she always took time to explain that all my father doings was because he loved me. because of this, i never really hated my dad, but i was still afraid of him.
as i grew up to understand what is right and what is wrong, my father also changed. He is still strict to me, but no more beating was used to discipline us kids. he still scold me at times when i did something wrong, but then i have come to understand that its all for my good. i also come to appreciate all his beating and forcing that he did for me; i even regretted he didn't forced me enough in some of the things, like learning piano and mandarin. this is because i know, if he hadn't forced me, i wouldn't have known how to speak english, how to swim or even how to protect myself. if he hadn't straighten my path, i might not even be the person that i am now.
now that im almost 20, my father has changed and gotten older a lot. he still at times look out and guide me, but he now believes that i know whats the best for myself. even i am now 18000 miles away from home, my parents don't need to monitor me from time to time. although i don't work, i get my own financial freedom. compare to some of my friends need her mom to control him/her financially just to make sure that he/she does not do anything stupid. i am not perfect and i don't claim to be perfect, but i am happy that at least i can make my parents feel proud of me. i also understand that some of you have different experiences with different level of beating from me, and i don't think they are right. but looking at my cousins here, whose parents never beat or even rarely scold them, hold no respect for their parents are just disheartening. therefore, i still have to agree to beating(with no intent to harming) is necessary for parents to discipline their kids, until the point that they know for themselves what is and is not right to do. as for step-parents, its a different story as they are not actually "your" parents.
ps for krozi; i am a currently an undergraduate psych student at ucla, but i have no intention to be a psychologist or psychiatrist myself. it is true that psychologist/psychiatrist is a job with the highest suicide rate, but hey, maybe its because diagnosing a depressed person end up depressing u as well.
also my friend, people don't become psychologist/psychiatrist because they are mentally unstable, it is because they want to help people.
Cheers,
unlimited90
02-20-2010, 06:08 AM
#49
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what'd ya just call 'em? 
Hey, thanks for sharing 
IMO takes balls to just up and open to a bunch of strangers, but that's what it takes sometimes to keep moving forward... who knows, right?
Actually, just wanted to reflect a little on your address to Krozi regarding the suicide rate in Psych professionals. I think too many people in this profession themselves often do not know how to "unload" all the negativity that they accept in the course of their work hours from their patients. As a result, they are not as social and that leads to more issues and it ends up kind of snowballing with a whole lot of issues, bottles up inside and eventually just snaps the nerves of the host. I have a few friends who are in the Psych profession - both private psychiatrists and social workers. Amazingly enough, the friend who is a social worker is the happiest guy of all - he went into this profession wanting to make the world a better place and he has this look on his face like he's succeeding a little bit every day. I won't draw any conclusions from this now, but it is food for thought...
after reading some of the posts, some of them being real sad, about people talking about their past, i can't help but to share my experience as well.
i am also an Asian decent, i got my fair share of beating. my father is a very strict person, i got beaten whenever i got a bad grade, fought with my siblings or did anything that was not appropriate; he also forced me to learn a lot of things from music to sports. When i was a kid, i was afraid of him. He could just literally look at me and make me quiet when i was crying after being scold or beaten. i also don't like how he forced me to learn a lot of things, because that would take away most of my holiday time. however, my mother would always be the person who care and console me after i got beaten. she was the one who let me felt that i am still being loved after i got beaten. she always took time to explain that all my father doings was because he loved me. because of this, i never really hated my dad, but i was still afraid of him.
as i grew up to understand what is right and what is wrong, my father also changed. He is still strict to me, but no more beating was used to discipline us kids. he still scold me at times when i did something wrong, but then i have come to understand that its all for my good. i also come to appreciate all his beating and forcing that he did for me; i even regretted he didn't forced me enough in some of the things, like learning piano and mandarin. this is because i know, if he hadn't forced me, i wouldn't have known how to speak english, how to swim or even how to protect myself. if he hadn't straighten my path, i might not even be the person that i am now.
now that im almost 20, my father has changed and gotten older a lot. he still at times look out and guide me, but he now believes that i know whats the best for myself. even i am now 18000 miles away from home, my parents don't need to monitor me from time to time. although i don't work, i get my own financial freedom. compare to some of my friends need her mom to control him/her financially just to make sure that he/she does not do anything stupid. i am not perfect and i don't claim to be perfect, but i am happy that at least i can make my parents feel proud of me. i also understand that some of you have different experiences with different level of beating from me, and i don't think they are right. but looking at my cousins here, whose parents never beat or even rarely scold them, hold no respect for their parents are just disheartening. therefore, i still have to agree to beating(with no intent to harming) is necessary for parents to discipline their kids, until the point that they know for themselves what is and is not right to do. as for step-parents, its a different story as they are not actually "your" parents.
ps for krozi; i am a currently an undergraduate psych student at ucla, but i have no intention to be a psychologist or psychiatrist myself. it is true that psychologist/psychiatrist is a job with the highest suicide rate, but hey, maybe its because diagnosing a depressed person end up depressing u as well.
also my friend, people don't become psychologist/psychiatrist because they are mentally unstable, it is because they want to help people.
Cheers,
unlimited90
i am also an Asian decent, i got my fair share of beating. my father is a very strict person, i got beaten whenever i got a bad grade, fought with my siblings or did anything that was not appropriate; he also forced me to learn a lot of things from music to sports. When i was a kid, i was afraid of him. He could just literally look at me and make me quiet when i was crying after being scold or beaten. i also don't like how he forced me to learn a lot of things, because that would take away most of my holiday time. however, my mother would always be the person who care and console me after i got beaten. she was the one who let me felt that i am still being loved after i got beaten. she always took time to explain that all my father doings was because he loved me. because of this, i never really hated my dad, but i was still afraid of him.
as i grew up to understand what is right and what is wrong, my father also changed. He is still strict to me, but no more beating was used to discipline us kids. he still scold me at times when i did something wrong, but then i have come to understand that its all for my good. i also come to appreciate all his beating and forcing that he did for me; i even regretted he didn't forced me enough in some of the things, like learning piano and mandarin. this is because i know, if he hadn't forced me, i wouldn't have known how to speak english, how to swim or even how to protect myself. if he hadn't straighten my path, i might not even be the person that i am now.
now that im almost 20, my father has changed and gotten older a lot. he still at times look out and guide me, but he now believes that i know whats the best for myself. even i am now 18000 miles away from home, my parents don't need to monitor me from time to time. although i don't work, i get my own financial freedom. compare to some of my friends need her mom to control him/her financially just to make sure that he/she does not do anything stupid. i am not perfect and i don't claim to be perfect, but i am happy that at least i can make my parents feel proud of me. i also understand that some of you have different experiences with different level of beating from me, and i don't think they are right. but looking at my cousins here, whose parents never beat or even rarely scold them, hold no respect for their parents are just disheartening. therefore, i still have to agree to beating(with no intent to harming) is necessary for parents to discipline their kids, until the point that they know for themselves what is and is not right to do. as for step-parents, its a different story as they are not actually "your" parents.
ps for krozi; i am a currently an undergraduate psych student at ucla, but i have no intention to be a psychologist or psychiatrist myself. it is true that psychologist/psychiatrist is a job with the highest suicide rate, but hey, maybe its because diagnosing a depressed person end up depressing u as well.
also my friend, people don't become psychologist/psychiatrist because they are mentally unstable, it is because they want to help people.
Cheers,
unlimited90
IMO takes balls to just up and open to a bunch of strangers, but that's what it takes sometimes to keep moving forward... who knows, right?
Actually, just wanted to reflect a little on your address to Krozi regarding the suicide rate in Psych professionals. I think too many people in this profession themselves often do not know how to "unload" all the negativity that they accept in the course of their work hours from their patients. As a result, they are not as social and that leads to more issues and it ends up kind of snowballing with a whole lot of issues, bottles up inside and eventually just snaps the nerves of the host. I have a few friends who are in the Psych profession - both private psychiatrists and social workers. Amazingly enough, the friend who is a social worker is the happiest guy of all - he went into this profession wanting to make the world a better place and he has this look on his face like he's succeeding a little bit every day. I won't draw any conclusions from this now, but it is food for thought...
02-20-2010, 07:42 AM
#50
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what'd ya just call 'em?
Hey, thanks for sharing
IMO takes balls to just up and open to a bunch of strangers, but that's what it takes sometimes to keep moving forward... who knows, right?
Actually, just wanted to reflect a little on your address to Krozi regarding the suicide rate in Psych professionals. I think too many people in this profession themselves often do not know how to "unload" all the negativity that they accept in the course of their work hours from their patients. As a result, they are not as social and that leads to more issues and it ends up kind of snowballing with a whole lot of issues, bottles up inside and eventually just snaps the nerves of the host. I have a few friends who are in the Psych profession - both private psychiatrists and social workers. Amazingly enough, the friend who is a social worker is the happiest guy of all - he went into this profession wanting to make the world a better place and he has this look on his face like he's succeeding a little bit every day. I won't draw any conclusions from this now, but it is food for thought...
Hey, thanks for sharing
IMO takes balls to just up and open to a bunch of strangers, but that's what it takes sometimes to keep moving forward... who knows, right?
Actually, just wanted to reflect a little on your address to Krozi regarding the suicide rate in Psych professionals. I think too many people in this profession themselves often do not know how to "unload" all the negativity that they accept in the course of their work hours from their patients. As a result, they are not as social and that leads to more issues and it ends up kind of snowballing with a whole lot of issues, bottles up inside and eventually just snaps the nerves of the host. I have a few friends who are in the Psych profession - both private psychiatrists and social workers. Amazingly enough, the friend who is a social worker is the happiest guy of all - he went into this profession wanting to make the world a better place and he has this look on his face like he's succeeding a little bit every day. I won't draw any conclusions from this now, but it is food for thought...
