Help Me Understand How You Maintain an E60 M5
There comes a time in every automotive enthusiast’s life when you get a hankering for something new, something more wonderfully ridiculous than your current daily driver. It usually isn’t practical. It definitely wouldn’t be reliable. Also, it most likely would leave you broke and divorced because your significant other would get fed up with constantly hearing, “It’ll be fixed this time, I promise.”
It happens to all of us. In fact, it happened to me just the other week. Many of you might know I own an FR-S. It’s a great little car. It’s got wonderful handling and I can do clutch kicks all day long to get the tail end to slide out. The FR-S is a brilliant little car and I’ve become a better driver by driving it.
However, in the last few weeks, I’ve felt a longing for something a bit more wild. I’ve begun to want something with more horsepower and the ability to transport more than one other human being. Being the automotive geek I am, I would like something with a bit more…character.
I decided then that what I absolutely needed was an E60 M5. Preferably in Indianapolis Red. You see, I’ve had a deep longing for that car ever since it came out. First off, I love fast four-doors. They’re the absolute best things in the world. Second, I want that amazingly brilliant-sounding engine. My God. You mean I can have a four-door car with a V10? Where do I sign?
However, unlike my last used car purchase (of a W8 Passat that was a nightmare), which I prepared for by only watching YouTube videos, this time I thought I’d ask a few friends that knew more about the car than I did. I decided I would consult this very forum, too. I wanted to know whether I would end up crying and in debt or jumping for joy.
My hopes and dreams were soon dashed.
Everyone I talked to – friends, family, BMW owners, and Doug DeMuro from Jalopnik – told me to run and hide. They said that the car would sit quietly for a brief time, make me fall in love with it, then maul the heck out of my wallet as soon as I got comfortable.
Now, a few weeks later, I’m still down. I really wanted that M5, but here’s the reason for this little article: How the heck do you E60 M5 owners do it? Are you just constantly paying through the nose to keep it working? I’ve seen no less than 20 on the streets in the last few weeks. How do you do it?
Maybe the story will have a happy ending. Maybe I’ll die alone. Who knows? I still want to know how in the hell you all keep them on the road. Please fill me in.
