British Child Support Agency Claim forms...
04-03-2006, 11:40 PM
#1
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The following are all replies that British women have put on Child Support
Agency forms in the section for listing father's details. These are genuine
excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check number 11, it takes the prize.
____________________
1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered
by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but
I believe that he was conceived on the same night.
2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being
sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide
you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps.
3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived
at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue where I had unprotected sex with a man I
met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you
do manage to track down the father, can you send me his phone number? Thanks.
4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW
that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps
you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it
replaced.
5. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope
confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ
risen again.
6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to
do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for
the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the
country. Please advise.
7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look the
same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.
8. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him, can
you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?
9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro Disney;
maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.
10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for
sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If
I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146
Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.
11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all when
you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.
Elaine
Agency forms in the section for listing father's details. These are genuine
excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check number 11, it takes the prize.
____________________
1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered
by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of child B, but
I believe that he was conceived on the same night.
2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was being
sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can provide
you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party if this helps.
3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was conceived
at a party at 3600 Grand Avenue where I had unprotected sex with a man I
met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I fainted. If you
do manage to track down the father, can you send me his phone number? Thanks.
4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW
that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps
you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's had it
replaced.
5. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope
confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ
risen again.
6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to
do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications for
the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by the
country. Please advise.
7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look the
same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.
8. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him, can
you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?
9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at Euro Disney;
maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.
10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember for
sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening. If
I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party at 146
Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilized.
11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all when
you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.
Elaine
04-04-2006, 12:39 AM
#2
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My Ride: 520d GT, Blue, Beige Dakota Leather, Pro Sat Nav, Interior Lights Pack, Adaptive Lights, Advanced Aircon
No11
I like Number 3 too - must have ben me!
04-05-2006, 04:41 AM
#5
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My Ride: (USA) 645Ci, Silver Gray, Chateau, Cold Weather PKG, Premium Sound PKG, Sport PKG, Step, NAV [Std Equip in 645], HUD, Satellite (SIRIUS) Radio, Aux Input, Bluetooth enabled using iPhone 3GS w/ adapter cradle - Build date - 01/05, Baby delivered 2/24/05
04-09-2006, 06:00 PM
#7
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My Ride: In a place where the Mercedes density is the highest in the world (no. of MB per square kilometer) I choose a Bimmer, why? because of one thing "The Ultimate Driving Experience"
My Ride:
523i Steptronic, Silver Grey Exterior, Black Interior with Black Dakota Leather and Maple Wood Trim. Chrome Grill, Style 123 rim, Airbags everywhere, PDC, Rain sensor, Auto lights, Moveable front armrest, Advance Climate Control, Glass Sunroof, Auto dimming interior and exterior mirror with foldable functions, Extended Lights package, 6 CD changer in glove box, Power seats with memory, Power adjustable steering wheel, Power rear sunblinds.
Add ons: 123 wheels, chrome grill, K&N Hi flow filter, Eibach Pro Kit, e60.net decal and 24,000km
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1999 E46 323i
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Gotta love number 2, how the hell can you be taken unexpectedly from behind? Idiots.
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