fiancee almost dumped me cos of m6 rims
06-09-2010, 08:24 AM
#41
Contributors
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Birmingham AL
Posts: 1,128
Likes: 0
Received 1 Like
on
1 Post
My Ride: 2010 VW Passat Wagon 2.0l Tsi
Grey/Grey Budapest 18"
Lost to HPFP issues:
08 535i sport pkg
Lost to Dreaded E61 Sun roof leaks:
07 E61 530Xi
I married a "farm" girl too. But she makes considerably more than me....so I have the reverse of what most of you all have. I just have to bite the bullet on her Shoe and clothing purchases and the wacked out in-laws...she deals with my Car and other hobbies... 
As the saying goes "money is the root of all evil" but "Money makes the world go round".
If you all are having issues now before you all are married with the finances... things will be an order of magnitude worse after getting hitched. I would HIGHLY recommend pre marital counseling to deal with the issues. If not as have been stated things will get bad and bad quickly...you don't want to contribute to the ever growing 50% divorce statistic.
You all sound like you need a to "clear" things out with a mediated setting , just don't go all "Frank the Tank" and start talking about Appelbees waitresses Underpants...
As the saying goes "money is the root of all evil" but "Money makes the world go round".
If you all are having issues now before you all are married with the finances... things will be an order of magnitude worse after getting hitched. I would HIGHLY recommend pre marital counseling to deal with the issues. If not as have been stated things will get bad and bad quickly...you don't want to contribute to the ever growing 50% divorce statistic.
You all sound like you need a to "clear" things out with a mediated setting , just don't go all "Frank the Tank" and start talking about Appelbees waitresses Underpants...
06-09-2010, 08:27 AM
#42
Contributors
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 2,114
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
My Ride: 2005 BMW 545i, Silver Grey, Sport Package, R. Shades, Cold Pkg, Sat. Rad., Prem. Sound.
Love can blind you. Material things cannot compare to love. You decide . . . 
06-09-2010, 08:28 AM
#43
Contributors
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Jersey
Posts: 7,053
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
My Ride: 2004 530i
Model Year: 2004
IMHO - As long as your financial plan is sound and you have put money away for all the important and routine stuff, sush as, mortgage, credit cards, bills, retirement, emergency savings, etc. Whatever left is yours and feel free to play with. It's YOUR money.
06-09-2010, 08:33 AM
#44
Members
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Chattanooga, TN
Posts: 52
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
My Ride: 07' 550I
Black
So i bought my e60 in April i upgraded from an E46 the fiancee was against it from the very beginning and she never loosened her stance on it even after i got it. She's a farm girl one of those types that hates spending money me on the other hand i have always loved bmw's and it was only right that i upgraded to something better than an e46. Anyways so after i got the e60 she said she just about had it with me and if i spend money stupidly again she would cancel our Aug 28th wedding but after looking on this forum saw how fully moded everyones e60 was i figured what da heck its my money so i bought the M6 rep wheels from Superbuytires, they got in today and unfortunately for me she got home before to see four packages on the back door opened them and found some rims in there..That was it for her she flipped da heck out left the house before i got home and wouldnt tell me where she went. I just finally talked her down after she made me promise that no more money is going towards the car. Dang sometimes i miss my bachelor days i buy rims and my buddies and screaming damn dude that's hot now i buy rims and i almost get dumped. lol
DO NOT MARRY HER!! RUN AWAY!! Seriously man that is one busy body, super control freak! It's your damn money and if you want a car with nice rims then buy it and enjoy it. Money is not meant to be sat on until you are old and wrinkled and pissing yourself. Do you wanna work the next uptine years so you can afford the frilly crap she wants in the house and vacations with the inlaws??
06-09-2010, 08:37 AM
#45
Contributors
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: new york
Posts: 5,073
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
My Ride: 2011, E90 M3 Sedan. Alpine White.Competition package, Keyhole cover, fender reflectors in Alpine white, RPI Exhaust, 19
That sux man... Can you really afford this car stuff though? Are you guys struggling with basic bills and such? If so then i can understand her "passion" about not spending money. But if you guys are all set and have enough income to play with, then she might be a bit controlling and unreasonable. Although if you are the breadwinner by far, then you should be able to do whatever you want as long as the rent is paid and the utilitys stay on.
unless you're head-over-heals in credit card bills, you should be free to spend money how you want. I'd definitely run the other way too if my GF or fiance is this controlling over MY money. imagine after you're married and she now feels that you're spending HER money. kinda need to put her in her place now; otherwise she'll be walking all over you for the next 50 years.
congrats on the wheels though. great choice on the M6 wheels
congrats on the wheels though. great choice on the M6 wheels
You guys are friggin sissies!
First, OF COURSE she flipped! So what?! Big deal! Dude, if this is THE ONE for you, fuck the car, the rims, and everything else - she's gotta come first! If you yourself don't feel like she's the one, then okay, maybe you should see what's what. But you know, so many times people would give you "advice" without really knowing the situation... my firm opinion is that your woman is ALWAYS right. The only reason you could stray from that is if you suspect that she does NOT have your best interests at heart. But if you have no real reason to think she's not in love with you, forget about those weak fools that tell you to "run"! If your woman can't tell you you're a dumbass for blowing dough on rims, then it isn't any kind of a relationship anyway. If you wanna be happy in marriage - it is all about making your wife happy first
And do yourself a favor, don't do shit without first coercing her into it
I can give you mad suggestions - I did cross drilled slotted rotors, bodykit, etc etc etc - all done with my lady's full knowledge and support. She didn't always like it, but we are together and I have to consider her wishes before mine - that's just the only way it will work. Don't ask me why or how it works like that - it just that. Unless you're gay
PS and if you don't wanna get banned from this forums, I suggest you post up some pics ASAP! Or these bitches gonna flip on you so bad, your girl's flippage will look like childplay
First, OF COURSE she flipped! So what?! Big deal! Dude, if this is THE ONE for you, fuck the car, the rims, and everything else - she's gotta come first! If you yourself don't feel like she's the one, then okay, maybe you should see what's what. But you know, so many times people would give you "advice" without really knowing the situation... my firm opinion is that your woman is ALWAYS right. The only reason you could stray from that is if you suspect that she does NOT have your best interests at heart. But if you have no real reason to think she's not in love with you, forget about those weak fools that tell you to "run"! If your woman can't tell you you're a dumbass for blowing dough on rims, then it isn't any kind of a relationship anyway. If you wanna be happy in marriage - it is all about making your wife happy first
And do yourself a favor, don't do shit without first coercing her into it
I can give you mad suggestions - I did cross drilled slotted rotors, bodykit, etc etc etc - all done with my lady's full knowledge and support. She didn't always like it, but we are together and I have to consider her wishes before mine - that's just the only way it will work. Don't ask me why or how it works like that - it just that. Unless you're gay
PS and if you don't wanna get banned from this forums, I suggest you post up some pics ASAP! Or these bitches gonna flip on you so bad, your girl's flippage will look like childplay
Listen i only saw Carol respond on here as well, so listen to us.. this is stupid, plain and simple, country girl or not she shouldnt be threatening to cancel a friggen wedding due to a purchase of wheels.. if your struggling and you spend foolishly then i agree with her, not on cancelling the wedding and all, but the flipping out part.. but if this is a control thing, then boy you better prepare yourself for a restricted life.. the one you know now will be over. that is not how you deal with or handle things in a marriage or any relationship for that matter.. im all for love and im a sucker for it, but thats bullshit imo.. at this point in my life if anyone told me what i can or cannot do they would be talking to the back of my body as i walk away. dont set yourself up in a bad situation, handle it now..
and if you guys are opposites beware, i have a friend now whos married a long time and say dont ever believe that crap about opposites attract, he said its CRAP! lolol.. good luck dude.. and
post pics of your car and wheels.. well be your support team when your fiance gives you the boot.. we all love being bad influences here!!!! welcome!!!!
06-09-2010, 09:07 AM
#47
Contributors
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 1,921
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
I'm sure there's more to the story as to why she reacted this way... (giving her a slight benefit of the doubt) but honestly I agree with the majority that if this is how she reacts when you spend YOUR money, then how will it be when you start spending money that's supposedly "yours and hers," even if she earns some of it.
The part that really stuck with me was how you said she didn't flip out when you spent 15k on her ring but gave you $hit about the house, car and wheel purchase... all of which would eventually be "hers" as well! Please don't take this personally as this is just MY assessment of what I read.. but she sounds like a gold digger. You basically described a woman who is fine with you dropping cash on her, but once that money is spent on something else, she throws a fit. Are you looking forward to this future? ..
If I were in your situation, I would have dropped her like a bad habit... but that's just me.
I honestly wish you the best of luck.. a LOT of patience.. and most importantly... sign a prenup.
The part that really stuck with me was how you said she didn't flip out when you spent 15k on her ring but gave you $hit about the house, car and wheel purchase... all of which would eventually be "hers" as well! Please don't take this personally as this is just MY assessment of what I read.. but she sounds like a gold digger. You basically described a woman who is fine with you dropping cash on her, but once that money is spent on something else, she throws a fit. Are you looking forward to this future? ..
If I were in your situation, I would have dropped her like a bad habit... but that's just me.
I honestly wish you the best of luck.. a LOT of patience.. and most importantly... sign a prenup.
06-09-2010, 09:14 AM
#49
Senior Members
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 531
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
My Ride: 2000 540i/6: Silver
Model Year: 2000
this is funny.
ive read other threads like this where guys get shit from their girls for spending money.
ive never had a girlfriend that...
A. has a clue how much money i have
B. has been left wanting for something.
C. has ever felt like i couldnt afford any of the things i own.
maybe you let your fiancee see too much. i mean she's your future wife i get it but, she doesnt need to know the extent of your financials. all she needs to know is that she has a roof over her head, food on her plate, and clothes on her back. i honestly think you have allowed her to get too close to your personal gains. im a lil more old fashioned, but i dont think my wife needs to know EVERYTHING that is going on. all she needs to know is that she is my wife and part of my family and yadayadayada...letting her know whats sittin in the bank, or how much money i earn? lmao, thatll be the day. if she so much as picked up my bank statements and started questioning id send her packing. there are many women who would like to be in the position to be with a guy who they dont need to worry about financially...and by not worry, i mean, blindly not worry.
plus...she should be happy that your stimulating the economy!
good luck dude. remember, always wear your pants. if you dont set up the boundaries and set your lines straight now, you will be hiding things your life. you dont want to hate your wife later. let her know now, this is how i am, you like it, good, you dont, S.I.E.
ive read other threads like this where guys get shit from their girls for spending money.
ive never had a girlfriend that...
A. has a clue how much money i have
B. has been left wanting for something.
C. has ever felt like i couldnt afford any of the things i own.
maybe you let your fiancee see too much. i mean she's your future wife i get it but, she doesnt need to know the extent of your financials. all she needs to know is that she has a roof over her head, food on her plate, and clothes on her back. i honestly think you have allowed her to get too close to your personal gains. im a lil more old fashioned, but i dont think my wife needs to know EVERYTHING that is going on. all she needs to know is that she is my wife and part of my family and yadayadayada...letting her know whats sittin in the bank, or how much money i earn? lmao, thatll be the day. if she so much as picked up my bank statements and started questioning id send her packing. there are many women who would like to be in the position to be with a guy who they dont need to worry about financially...and by not worry, i mean, blindly not worry.
plus...she should be happy that your stimulating the economy!
good luck dude. remember, always wear your pants. if you dont set up the boundaries and set your lines straight now, you will be hiding things your life. you dont want to hate your wife later. let her know now, this is how i am, you like it, good, you dont, S.I.E.
