Why I fired my Secretary
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Why I fired my Secretary.
Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning..
I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,? Happy Birthday!', and possibly have a small present for me.
As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone ' Happy Birthday.'
I thought...Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids...They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word..
So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, 'Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday ! '
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me.'
I said, 'Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day.
Let's go !'
We went to lunch.
But we didn't go where we normally would go.
She chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table.
We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office,
Do We ?'
I responded, 'I guess not.
What do you have in mind ?'
She said,
'Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner.'
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said,
' Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment.
I'll be right back.'
'Ok.' I nervously replied.
She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ...
Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing 'Happy Birthday'.
And I just sat there....
On the couch...
Naked.
Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning..
I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,? Happy Birthday!', and possibly have a small present for me.
As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone ' Happy Birthday.'
I thought...Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids...They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word..
So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, 'Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday ! '
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me.'
I said, 'Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day.
Let's go !'
We went to lunch.
But we didn't go where we normally would go.
She chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table.
We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office,
Do We ?'
I responded, 'I guess not.
What do you have in mind ?'
She said,
'Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner.'
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said,
' Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment.
I'll be right back.'
'Ok.' I nervously replied.
She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ...
Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing 'Happy Birthday'.
And I just sat there....
On the couch...
Naked.
#3
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My Ride: 2007 530i. Purchased 6/28/07. Titanium Silver Metallic, Black Dakota Leather, Dark Poplar Trim, Steptronic, Premium Package, Cold Weather Package, Bluetooth, Adaptive Control Xenons. 10/30/07 Added OEM 124s with 245/40/18 & 275/35/18 Michelin Pilot Sport A/S tires. Installed red Cal Covers� from BavAuto. 11/21/07 Added OEM all-weather floor mats (for winter, carpet in summer) and coat rack. 6/26/08 installed M5-style rear spoiler. 6/30/08 put on red reflectors. 8/22/08 Euro turn signal stickers applied. 3/20/09 Installed Shadowline Trim. 3/27/09 Added Matte Black Kidney Grilles from Trinity. 4/03/09 Installed Bimmian Shadow Matte Black 530i Badges. 4/04/09 Installed LED license plate lights from Trinity. 5/01/09 Installed Brabus Interior LED Kit and White Angel Eyes. 5/02/09 Put in Brabus 6K Fogs. 5/14/09 Removed charcoal filter. 5/15/09 Installed light smoke LED side marker lamps from Trinity. 5/21/09 Sprint Booster. 6/12/09 Painted exhaust tips flat black. 6/13/09 Pulled red Cal Covers and painted calipers low gloss black. 6/27/09 RPI Ram Air Scoop from Trinity. 8/15/09 Installed Brabus's silver invisibulbs front and rear. 9/24/09 Installed R-Dash license plate LEDs from Brabaus (John).
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AHAHAHAHA! New to me!
![Laughing](https://5series.net/forums/images/smilies/imported/laughing.gif)
#4
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My Ride: 2004 530i | Sapphire Black | Sport | Premium | NAV | Logic 7 | DPE R07 Variant S Gloss Black with Polished Lip 20x8.5 front 20x10 rear | Falken FK452 tires 245/30/20 front 275/30/20 rear | H&R Coilovers | Smoked Tail Lights | M5 trunk spoiler | AC Schnitzer style roof spoiler | HID 8000K headlights & foglights | 35% tint all around | Sprint Booster | Speed Innovation ECU tuning | M5 trunk finisher | M-Tech body kit | Remus Quad Exhaust | AC Schnitzer style pedals | Euro Stickers | RPi Ram Air Induction | Smoked LED Side Lenses | AC Schnitzer style e-brake handle | AC Schnitzer style shifter | AC Schnitzer style iDrive knob | AC Schnitzer style carbon fiber diffuser | carbon fiber hood/trunk/steering emblems | carbon fiber grilles | carbon fiber door pillars | MTEC v2 Angel Eyes | Hamann style carbon fiber splitter
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haha! kinda saw it coming, but funny nonetheless...
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#9
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My Ride: 2005 BMW 530d M-Sport TouringExterior: Titansilber Metallic, M5 mirrors, ACS rear roof spoiler, BMW Carbon Fiber rear diffuser, Adaptive Xenon headlights, AngeliBright v.3 Angel Eyes, F1 Autohaus Euphoria 6000K LED license plate lightsInterior: Black
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Originally Posted by CWS530' post='1003791' date='Sep 10 2009, 05:00 PM
AHAHAHAHA! New to me! ![Laughing](https://5series.net/forums/images/smilies/imported/laughing.gif)
![Laughing](https://5series.net/forums/images/smilies/imported/laughing.gif)
Damn!
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