Jimmy's Headache
06-26-2005, 02:52 PM
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The doctor said, "Jimmy, the good news is I can cure your headaches the bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine, and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles."
Jimmy was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.
As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life. He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need - a new suit."
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit."
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see...size 44 long."
Jimmy laughed, "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years!"
Jimmy tried on the suit. It fit perfectly. As Jimmy admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" Jimmy thought for a moment and then said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Jimmy and said, "Let's see...34 sleeve and 16 and a half neck." Jimmy was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?"
"Been in the business 60 years!" Jimmy tried on the shirt, and it fitted perfectly.
As Jimmy adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes?" Jimmy was on a roll and said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Jimmy's feet and said, "Let's see...9-1/2 E." Jimmy was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years!" Jimmy tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly.
Jimmy walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?"
Jimmy thought for a second and said, "Sure." The salesman stepped back, eyed Jimmy's waist and said, "Let's see...size 36." Jimmy laughed "Ah ha! I got you! I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old" The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. Size 34 underwear would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
:'( 
Jimmy was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.
As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life. He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need - a new suit."
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit."
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see...size 44 long."
Jimmy laughed, "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years!"
Jimmy tried on the suit. It fit perfectly. As Jimmy admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" Jimmy thought for a moment and then said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Jimmy and said, "Let's see...34 sleeve and 16 and a half neck." Jimmy was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?"
"Been in the business 60 years!" Jimmy tried on the shirt, and it fitted perfectly.
As Jimmy adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes?" Jimmy was on a roll and said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Jimmy's feet and said, "Let's see...9-1/2 E." Jimmy was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years!" Jimmy tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly.
Jimmy walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?"
Jimmy thought for a second and said, "Sure." The salesman stepped back, eyed Jimmy's waist and said, "Let's see...size 36." Jimmy laughed "Ah ha! I got you! I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old" The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. Size 34 underwear would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
:'(
06-27-2005, 11:25 AM
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06-27-2005, 12:05 PM
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