A couple of crude jokes....
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A beautiful tall blonde gets a cab home and realises she doesnt have any money to pay the fare, she gets out the cab lifts her skirt and asks the cab driver "can i pay with this?"
The driver replies "have you got anything smaller?"
The driver replies "have you got anything smaller?"
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A sailor enters a whore house and the Madam tells hims "sorry, all the girls are busy. The only one left is old Martha over there" She points to an old woman sitting in the corner knitting. The sailor says "I dunno, but oh well, I've been at sea for months and my hand isn't cutting it anymore" So he takes Martha to a room and they start going at it. The sailor finds her dry and loose and can't get into the mood so he stops and explains whats wrong. She says "hang on" and after a couple of minutes they start again. This time it's AMAZING, she is tight and wet and he's really enjoying it and asks: "wow, this feel great what did you do?" Martha tells him "I just took the scabs off and let the puss run and it started swelling" 
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Originally Posted by pjinca' post='1001874' date='Sep 8 2009, 03:19 PM
A sailor enters a whore house and the Madam tells hims "sorry, all the girls are busy. The only one left is old Martha over there" She points to an old woman sitting in the corner knitting. The sailor says "I dunno, but oh well, I've been at sea for months and my hand isn't cutting it anymore" So he takes Martha to a room and they start going at it. The sailor finds her dry and loose and can't get into the mood so he stops and explains whats wrong. She says "hang on" and after a couple of minutes they start again. This time it's AMAZING, she is tight and wet and he's really enjoying it and asks: "wow, this feel great what did you do?" Martha tells him "I just took the scabs off and let the puss run and it started swelling"
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