A couple of crude jokes....
09-07-2009, 09:31 AM
#1
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I was driving past a field and i saw a scarecrow having a w@nk.....
I thought to myself "thats impossible, he's just clutching at straws"
I read in the paper the other day that a Dwarf had his pocket picked......
I thought to myself how could someone stoop so low?
I thought to myself "thats impossible, he's just clutching at straws"
I read in the paper the other day that a Dwarf had his pocket picked......
I thought to myself how could someone stoop so low?
09-07-2009, 09:41 AM
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My Ride: 2007 530i. Purchased 6/28/07. Titanium Silver Metallic, Black Dakota Leather, Dark Poplar Trim, Steptronic, Premium Package, Cold Weather Package, Bluetooth, Adaptive Control Xenons. 10/30/07 Added OEM 124s with 245/40/18 & 275/35/18 Michelin Pilot Sport A/S tires. Installed red Cal Covers� from BavAuto. 11/21/07 Added OEM all-weather floor mats (for winter, carpet in summer) and coat rack. 6/26/08 installed M5-style rear spoiler. 6/30/08 put on red reflectors. 8/22/08 Euro turn signal stickers applied. 3/20/09 Installed Shadowline Trim. 3/27/09 Added Matte Black Kidney Grilles from Trinity. 4/03/09 Installed Bimmian Shadow Matte Black 530i Badges. 4/04/09 Installed LED license plate lights from Trinity. 5/01/09 Installed Brabus Interior LED Kit and White Angel Eyes. 5/02/09 Put in Brabus 6K Fogs. 5/14/09 Removed charcoal filter. 5/15/09 Installed light smoke LED side marker lamps from Trinity. 5/21/09 Sprint Booster. 6/12/09 Painted exhaust tips flat black. 6/13/09 Pulled red Cal Covers and painted calipers low gloss black. 6/27/09 RPI Ram Air Scoop from Trinity. 8/15/09 Installed Brabus's silver invisibulbs front and rear. 9/24/09 Installed R-Dash license plate LEDs from Brabaus (John).
09-07-2009, 10:48 AM
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My Ride: Jan 2006 E63 650i Sport
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09-07-2009, 11:32 AM
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My Ride: 2008 550i Jet Black on Black Leather, SAT with Paddles, Logic 7, Comfort Seats, NAV, Sport Package, PDC, Xenons, Sirius, Trinity 12W LED Angel Eyes, RPi GT Exhaust, M rear spoiler, ACS Roof Spoiler, Tinted Tail Lights, Bimmian Carbon Fiber Pillar Trim, Bimmian Shadow 550i emblem, RPi Scoop, E60 Forum Cling, Mtec bulbs in fog lights, Mtec 2W LED for License Plate Light Bulbs, K&N Filter, Bimmian LED Smoked Side Markers, Blackout roundels, Carbon Fiber Kidney Grills.
Retired Rides - 1989 325i convertible, 1995 M3, 2002 X5, 2005 545i, 2008 X5 (Lemon)
*Groaners!*
09-07-2009, 12:33 PM
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My Ride: 520d Black & SL350
A pervert approaches a young whore in the street.
The pervert asks, "Are you up for something a bit different young lady?"
The prossie replies "er, okay...it's been a bit quiet...come upstairs with me."
The prossie goes into the bathroom for two minutes to powder her nose, then comes back into the bedroom.
To her surprise, the pervert hands her ?50 and says "Thanks that was great!"
The prossies says, "But I haven't done anything yet?"
"True," says the pervert as he leaves, "But I've done a shite in your handbag."
The pervert asks, "Are you up for something a bit different young lady?"
The prossie replies "er, okay...it's been a bit quiet...come upstairs with me."
The prossie goes into the bathroom for two minutes to powder her nose, then comes back into the bedroom.
To her surprise, the pervert hands her ?50 and says "Thanks that was great!"
The prossies says, "But I haven't done anything yet?"
"True," says the pervert as he leaves, "But I've done a shite in your handbag."