Buzz Words
01-14-2005, 12:03 PM
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Frank Lingua, president and CEO of Dissembling Associates, is the nation's leading purveyor of buzzwords, catch phrases and cliches for people too busy to speak in plain English. Business Finance contributing editor Dan Danbom interviewed Lingua in his New York City office.
Danbom: Is being a cliche expert a full-time job?
Lingua: Bottom line is I have a full plate 24/7.
Danbom: Is it hard to keep up with the seemingly endless supply of cliches that spew from business?
Lingua: Some days, I don't have the bandwidth. It's like drinking from a fire hydrant.
Danbom: So it's difficult?
Lingua: Harder than nailing Jell-O to the wall.
Danbom: Where do most cliches come from?
Lingua: Stakeholders push the envelope until it's outside the box.
Danbom: How do you track them once they've been coined?
Lingua: It's like herding cats.
Danbom: Can you predict whether a phrase is going to become a cliche?
Lingua: Yes. I skate to where the puck's going to be. Because if you aren't the lead dog, you're not providing a customer-centric proactive solution.
Danbom: How do people know you're a cliche expert?
Lingua: I walk the walk and talk the talk.
Danbom: Did incomprehensibility come naturally to you?
Lingua: I wasn't wired that way, but it became mission-critical as I strategically focused on my go-forward plan.
Danbom: What did you do to develop this talent?
Lingua: It's not rocket science. It's not brain surgery. When you drill down to the granular level, it's just basic blocking and tackling.
Danbom: How do you stay ahead of others in the buzzword industry?
Lingua: Net-net, my value proposition is based on maximizing synergies and being first to market with a leveraged, value-added deliverable. That's the opportunity space on a level playing field.
Danbom: How can you live with yourself?
Lingua: I eat my own dog food. My vision is to monetize scalable supply chains.
Danbom: When are you going to quit this?
Lingua: I may eventually exit the business to pursue other career opportunities.
Danbom: I hate you.
Lingua: Take it and run with it.
Danbom: Is being a cliche expert a full-time job?
Lingua: Bottom line is I have a full plate 24/7.
Danbom: Is it hard to keep up with the seemingly endless supply of cliches that spew from business?
Lingua: Some days, I don't have the bandwidth. It's like drinking from a fire hydrant.
Danbom: So it's difficult?
Lingua: Harder than nailing Jell-O to the wall.
Danbom: Where do most cliches come from?
Lingua: Stakeholders push the envelope until it's outside the box.
Danbom: How do you track them once they've been coined?
Lingua: It's like herding cats.
Danbom: Can you predict whether a phrase is going to become a cliche?
Lingua: Yes. I skate to where the puck's going to be. Because if you aren't the lead dog, you're not providing a customer-centric proactive solution.
Danbom: How do people know you're a cliche expert?
Lingua: I walk the walk and talk the talk.
Danbom: Did incomprehensibility come naturally to you?
Lingua: I wasn't wired that way, but it became mission-critical as I strategically focused on my go-forward plan.
Danbom: What did you do to develop this talent?
Lingua: It's not rocket science. It's not brain surgery. When you drill down to the granular level, it's just basic blocking and tackling.
Danbom: How do you stay ahead of others in the buzzword industry?
Lingua: Net-net, my value proposition is based on maximizing synergies and being first to market with a leveraged, value-added deliverable. That's the opportunity space on a level playing field.
Danbom: How can you live with yourself?
Lingua: I eat my own dog food. My vision is to monetize scalable supply chains.
Danbom: When are you going to quit this?
Lingua: I may eventually exit the business to pursue other career opportunities.
Danbom: I hate you.
Lingua: Take it and run with it.
01-14-2005, 10:48 PM
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