Never choke in a restaurant in the South...
09-19-2006 | 03:11 PM
#1
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From: San Luis Obispo, California
My Ride: 2007 Titanium Gray 550i, with sport, nav, HUD, Logic7, sat radio, cold weather, rear side airbags, rear seat heaters, and it goes like a bat outta hell!
Two hillbillies walk into a bar.
While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation.
Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough.
After a minute or so, it becomes apparent That she is in real distress.
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, "Kin ya swallar?"
The woman shakes her head no.
"Kin ya breathe?"
The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.
The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks down her drawers and
quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.
As she begins to breathe again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.
His partner says, ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver', but I ain't never seed nobody do it!"
While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation.
Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough.
After a minute or so, it becomes apparent That she is in real distress.
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, "Kin ya swallar?"
The woman shakes her head no.
"Kin ya breathe?"
The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.
The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks down her drawers and
quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.
As she begins to breathe again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.
His partner says, ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver', but I ain't never seed nobody do it!"
09-19-2006 | 04:39 PM
#3
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Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 751
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From: Bahrain
My Ride: 2005 525i : Alpine White, Steptronic, Black Interior with Amethyst Leather & Popular Grain Brown, 17" 122-Style Rims, Adaptive Bi-Xenon Headlights, Auto Dimming & Folding Mirrors, Advanced A/C, Sports Steering Wheel, Electrically Adjustable Steering Column, Extended Lighting Package, PDC, Sliding Armrest, Bus Navi, Hi-Fi Sound System (MP3 DVDs), CD Changer, Rear Sunshades..
MODS:M-tech front bumper, Painted Grill, Installed Aux-In, Garage Door Opener (Overhead Compartement), ///M Steering wheel, Wood hand brake trim, Wood gear-shift lever. 35% Tint all around..
Got, ACS Roof Spoiler, but not installed..
09-20-2006 | 05:43 AM
#7
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From: Peterborough - UK
My Ride: -Current-
535d Sport LCI
Bi-Xenon Adaptive Lights, S.A.T, Professional SatNav, Logic7, Elec Memory seats, iPod interface, 19" Alloys WITHOUT RUNFLATS!
CIC and Combox Retrofit, White Angel Eyes, Speed in Centre console.
-Previous-
Mini Cooper S
525d Tourer Auto
Absolutly dreadful. im using it this weekend though 
09-20-2006 | 06:34 AM
#8
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Joined: Oct 2004
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From: White Plains, NY
My Ride: 2008 550, Carbon Black Metallic, Natural Brown Dakota Leather, Sport Package, Sport Automatic Transmission, Cold Weather Package, Power Rear and Manual Side Sun Shades, etc.
Retired - 2004 545 SMG, Black Sapphire Metallic, Auburn Dakota Leather, Cold Weather and Sports Packages, Power Rear and Manual Side Sun Shades
I love any joke that starts "Two hillbillies . . . "
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