I have a Chinese doctor........
11-03-2009, 02:44 PM
#1
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My Ride: 2006 525XI, Jet black on Dakota beige. Premium and winter packages. I consider myself a purist and intend to keep my car absolutely stock and shiny.
2008 328I Convertible, Sapphire black on beige interior. Premium package, NAV, iPod adapter.
Retired: 2002 325I, Titanium silver on black leather. Premium package. Absolutely stock and proud of it.
....and this is what we discussed:
Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually.. Speed up heart not make live longer; that like say you can extend life of car by driving faster. Want live longer? Take nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does cow eat? Hay and corn. What are these? Vegetables. So, steak nothing more than efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef also good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And pork chop can give 100% recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine. That means they take water out of fruity bit; get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: If you have body and you have fat, ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, ratio is two to one, etc.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Cannot think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No Pain...Good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING!!! .... Foods fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only do sit-ups if want bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: You crazy? HELLO ... Cocoa beans! Vegetable!!! Cocoa beans best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.
Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is shape!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
Q: Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually.. Speed up heart not make live longer; that like say you can extend life of car by driving faster. Want live longer? Take nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does cow eat? Hay and corn. What are these? Vegetables. So, steak nothing more than efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef also good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And pork chop can give 100% recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine. That means they take water out of fruity bit; get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: If you have body and you have fat, ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, ratio is two to one, etc.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Cannot think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No Pain...Good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU NOT LISTENING!!! .... Foods fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only do sit-ups if want bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: You crazy? HELLO ... Cocoa beans! Vegetable!!! Cocoa beans best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.
Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is shape!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
11-03-2009, 02:55 PM
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Originally Posted by porsche911targa' post='1046404' date='Nov 3 2009, 06:44 PM
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.
11-03-2009, 02:56 PM
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Originally Posted by porsche911targa' post='1046404' date='Nov 3 2009, 06:44 PM
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.
11-03-2009, 03:07 PM
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Originally Posted by porsche911targa' post='1046404' date='Nov 3 2009, 06:44 PM
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.
11-03-2009, 03:08 PM
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My Ride: 2008 550i Jet Black on Black Leather, SAT with Paddles, Logic 7, Comfort Seats, NAV, Sport Package, PDC, Xenons, Sirius, Trinity 12W LED Angel Eyes, RPi GT Exhaust, M rear spoiler, ACS Roof Spoiler, Tinted Tail Lights, Bimmian Carbon Fiber Pillar Trim, Bimmian Shadow 550i emblem, RPi Scoop, E60 Forum Cling, Mtec bulbs in fog lights, Mtec 2W LED for License Plate Light Bulbs, K&N Filter, Bimmian LED Smoked Side Markers, Blackout roundels, Carbon Fiber Kidney Grills.
Retired Rides - 1989 325i convertible, 1995 M3, 2002 X5, 2005 545i, 2008 X5 (Lemon)
I'm on it Iceman! 
porsche911targa meet Tonymac, Tonymac, meet porsche911targa!! 
BTW Iceman, did you notice that the time is off by an hour on the forum??
porsche911targa meet Tonymac, Tonymac, meet porsche911targa!! BTW Iceman, did you notice that the time is off by an hour on the forum??
11-03-2009, 03:19 PM
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My Ride: 2006 525XI, Jet black on Dakota beige. Premium and winter packages. I consider myself a purist and intend to keep my car absolutely stock and shiny.
2008 328I Convertible, Sapphire black on beige interior. Premium package, NAV, iPod adapter.
Retired: 2002 325I, Titanium silver on black leather. Premium package. Absolutely stock and proud of it.
Tonymac is the God of all jokes..... 
I've never seen it though and I am sure many new members haven't see it either.
I've never seen it though and I am sure many new members haven't see it either.
