Council job
03-03-2009, 06:41 AM
#1
Contributors
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Herts, UK
Posts: 2,013
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
A guy goes to the Local Council to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'
He answers 'Yes - caffeine'
'Have you ever been in the services?'
'Yes,' he says. 'I was in Iraq for two years.'
The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward employment,' and then asks, 'Are you disabled in any way?
The guy says, 'Yes ...a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles off.'
The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you right now.
Normal hours are from 8 AM to 2 PM.
You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10 AM every day.'
The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 2 PM, why don't you want me to be here before 10 AM?' '
'This is a council job,' the interviewer says.
'For the first two hours we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our bollocks, not really any point in you coming in before ten ! !
The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'
He answers 'Yes - caffeine'
'Have you ever been in the services?'
'Yes,' he says. 'I was in Iraq for two years.'
The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward employment,' and then asks, 'Are you disabled in any way?
The guy says, 'Yes ...a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles off.'
The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you right now.
Normal hours are from 8 AM to 2 PM.
You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10 AM every day.'
The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 2 PM, why don't you want me to be here before 10 AM?' '
'This is a council job,' the interviewer says.
'For the first two hours we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our bollocks, not really any point in you coming in before ten ! !
03-03-2009, 07:03 AM
#2
Contributors
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: St. Louis Burbs, USA
Posts: 8,998
Likes: 0
Received 1 Like
on
1 Post
My Ride: 2007 530i. Purchased 6/28/07. Titanium Silver Metallic, Black Dakota Leather, Dark Poplar Trim, Steptronic, Premium Package, Cold Weather Package, Bluetooth, Adaptive Control Xenons. 10/30/07 Added OEM 124s with 245/40/18 & 275/35/18 Michelin Pilot Sport A/S tires. Installed red Cal Covers� from BavAuto. 11/21/07 Added OEM all-weather floor mats (for winter, carpet in summer) and coat rack. 6/26/08 installed M5-style rear spoiler. 6/30/08 put on red reflectors. 8/22/08 Euro turn signal stickers applied. 3/20/09 Installed Shadowline Trim. 3/27/09 Added Matte Black Kidney Grilles from Trinity. 4/03/09 Installed Bimmian Shadow Matte Black 530i Badges. 4/04/09 Installed LED license plate lights from Trinity. 5/01/09 Installed Brabus Interior LED Kit and White Angel Eyes. 5/02/09 Put in Brabus 6K Fogs. 5/14/09 Removed charcoal filter. 5/15/09 Installed light smoke LED side marker lamps from Trinity. 5/21/09 Sprint Booster. 6/12/09 Painted exhaust tips flat black. 6/13/09 Pulled red Cal Covers and painted calipers low gloss black. 6/27/09 RPI Ram Air Scoop from Trinity. 8/15/09 Installed Brabus's silver invisibulbs front and rear. 9/24/09 Installed R-Dash license plate LEDs from Brabaus (John).
Sorry, but, rrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeepppppppppppoooooooossssssssssstt ttttt.
03-03-2009, 07:04 AM
#3
Contributors
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Herts, UK
Posts: 2,013
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by CWS530' post='806205' date='Mar 3 2009, 04:03 PM
Sorry, but, rrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeepppppppppppoooooooossssssssssstt ttttt.
Damn, I have been gone too long. I missed about 20,000 topics..
Sry all.
03-03-2009, 07:45 AM
#4
Contributors
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: St. Louis Burbs, USA
Posts: 8,998
Likes: 0
Received 1 Like
on
1 Post
My Ride: 2007 530i. Purchased 6/28/07. Titanium Silver Metallic, Black Dakota Leather, Dark Poplar Trim, Steptronic, Premium Package, Cold Weather Package, Bluetooth, Adaptive Control Xenons. 10/30/07 Added OEM 124s with 245/40/18 & 275/35/18 Michelin Pilot Sport A/S tires. Installed red Cal Covers� from BavAuto. 11/21/07 Added OEM all-weather floor mats (for winter, carpet in summer) and coat rack. 6/26/08 installed M5-style rear spoiler. 6/30/08 put on red reflectors. 8/22/08 Euro turn signal stickers applied. 3/20/09 Installed Shadowline Trim. 3/27/09 Added Matte Black Kidney Grilles from Trinity. 4/03/09 Installed Bimmian Shadow Matte Black 530i Badges. 4/04/09 Installed LED license plate lights from Trinity. 5/01/09 Installed Brabus Interior LED Kit and White Angel Eyes. 5/02/09 Put in Brabus 6K Fogs. 5/14/09 Removed charcoal filter. 5/15/09 Installed light smoke LED side marker lamps from Trinity. 5/21/09 Sprint Booster. 6/12/09 Painted exhaust tips flat black. 6/13/09 Pulled red Cal Covers and painted calipers low gloss black. 6/27/09 RPI Ram Air Scoop from Trinity. 8/15/09 Installed Brabus's silver invisibulbs front and rear. 9/24/09 Installed R-Dash license plate LEDs from Brabaus (John).
Originally Posted by Flowerfred' post='806206' date='Mar 3 2009, 10:04 AM
Damn, I have been gone too long. I missed about 20,000 topics..
Sry all.
Sry all.
03-03-2009, 08:10 AM
#5
Contributors
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Thousand Oaks, California
Posts: 11,084
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
My Ride: 2008 550i Jet Black on Black Leather, SAT with Paddles, Logic 7, Comfort Seats, NAV, Sport Package, PDC, Xenons, Sirius, Trinity 12W LED Angel Eyes, RPi GT Exhaust, M rear spoiler, ACS Roof Spoiler, Tinted Tail Lights, Bimmian Carbon Fiber Pillar Trim, Bimmian Shadow 550i emblem, RPi Scoop, E60 Forum Cling, Mtec bulbs in fog lights, Mtec 2W LED for License Plate Light Bulbs, K&N Filter, Bimmian LED Smoked Side Markers, Blackout roundels, Carbon Fiber Kidney Grills.
Retired Rides - 1989 325i convertible, 1995 M3, 2002 X5, 2005 545i, 2008 X5 (Lemon)
Originally Posted by Flowerfred' post='806206' date='Mar 3 2009, 08:04 AM
Damn, I have been gone too long. I missed about 20,000 topics..
Sry all.
Sry all.
BTW, member #328, you have been a member for a long time, where have you been? 
03-03-2009, 08:33 AM
#6
Contributors
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Herts, UK
Posts: 2,013
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by flyingpuck' post='806268' date='Mar 3 2009, 05:10 PM
BTW, member #328, you have been a member for a long time, where have you been?
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
Wonky
E60, E61 Parts, Accessories and Mods
4
04-12-2016 08:15 PM
timmay77
E61 Touring Discussion
7
09-24-2015 09:38 AM