BMW Media Release: New W5
12-30-2007, 09:59 PM
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BMW MEDIA RELEASE [31/12/07: Munich] Dietrich Flamm, head of BMW?s Wankel Division today announced that the luxury carmaker will immediately begin retooling all assembly lines to replace existing reciprocating piston-driven engines with the Wankel rotary engine. ?The most exciting aspect of this change will be evident in the BMW 5-Series,? said Flamm. ?Our fastest production vehicle will be the new W5, or Wankel 5.?
BMW?s venerable marketing team have already launched a new advertising campaign to tout the high-performance W5, which will include the catch-phrase: ?Need a break? Have a Wank!?
Flamm pointed out that although Mazda is generally credited with producing the first rotary-powered automobile, the 1967 Mazda Cosmo, the word "Mazda" is actually of Bavarian origin, and is loosely translated as "Teutonic Valveless Gasbag."
Because Wankel engines are simpler and contain fewer moving parts that piston engines, BMW will realize significant cost reductions, and will redirect much of those savings into phase 2 of BMW?s female empowerment non-profit subsidiary, now referred to as ?Ladies Wank Two.?
Realizing that owners of current M5s will likely rush at once to their local BMW dealers to trade in their cars for new W5s, BMW is urging restraint during the transition period, and is offering a temporary solution via their ?Wank Relief? program. Through June of 2008, M5 owners may remove their cars? M5 badges and replace them with complimentary self-stick W5 badges, as shown below. Poser indemnification insurance not included.
BMW?s venerable marketing team have already launched a new advertising campaign to tout the high-performance W5, which will include the catch-phrase: ?Need a break? Have a Wank!?
Flamm pointed out that although Mazda is generally credited with producing the first rotary-powered automobile, the 1967 Mazda Cosmo, the word "Mazda" is actually of Bavarian origin, and is loosely translated as "Teutonic Valveless Gasbag."
Because Wankel engines are simpler and contain fewer moving parts that piston engines, BMW will realize significant cost reductions, and will redirect much of those savings into phase 2 of BMW?s female empowerment non-profit subsidiary, now referred to as ?Ladies Wank Two.?
Realizing that owners of current M5s will likely rush at once to their local BMW dealers to trade in their cars for new W5s, BMW is urging restraint during the transition period, and is offering a temporary solution via their ?Wank Relief? program. Through June of 2008, M5 owners may remove their cars? M5 badges and replace them with complimentary self-stick W5 badges, as shown below. Poser indemnification insurance not included.
12-31-2007, 01:12 AM
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Originally Posted by GoRovers' post='512118' date='Dec 31 2007, 07:59 AM
BMW MEDIA RELEASE [31/12/07: Munich] Dietrich Flamm, head of BMW’s Wankel Division today announced that the luxury carmaker will immediately begin retooling all assembly lines to replace existing reciprocating piston-driven engines with the Wankel rotary engine. “The most exciting aspect of this change will be evident in the BMW 5-Series,” said Flamm. “Our fastest production vehicle will be the new W5, or Wankel 5.”
BMW’s venerable marketing team have already launched a new advertising campaign to tout the high-performance W5, which will include the catch-phrase: “Need a break? Have a Wank!”
Flamm pointed out that although Mazda is generally credited with producing the first rotary-powered automobile, the 1967 Mazda Cosmo, the word "Mazda" is actually of Bavarian origin, and is loosely translated as "Teutonic Valveless Gasbag."
Because Wankel engines are simpler and contain fewer moving parts that piston engines, BMW will realize significant cost reductions, and will redirect much of those savings into phase 2 of BMW’s female empowerment non-profit subsidiary, now referred to as “Ladies Wank Two.”
Realizing that owners of current M5s will likely rush at once to their local BMW dealers to trade in their cars for new W5s, BMW is urging restraint during the transition period, and is offering a temporary solution via their “Wank Relief” program. Through June of 2008, M5 owners may remove their cars’ M5 badges and replace them with complimentary self-stick W5 badges, as shown below. Poser indemnification insurance not included.
BMW’s venerable marketing team have already launched a new advertising campaign to tout the high-performance W5, which will include the catch-phrase: “Need a break? Have a Wank!”
Flamm pointed out that although Mazda is generally credited with producing the first rotary-powered automobile, the 1967 Mazda Cosmo, the word "Mazda" is actually of Bavarian origin, and is loosely translated as "Teutonic Valveless Gasbag."
Because Wankel engines are simpler and contain fewer moving parts that piston engines, BMW will realize significant cost reductions, and will redirect much of those savings into phase 2 of BMW’s female empowerment non-profit subsidiary, now referred to as “Ladies Wank Two.”
Realizing that owners of current M5s will likely rush at once to their local BMW dealers to trade in their cars for new W5s, BMW is urging restraint during the transition period, and is offering a temporary solution via their “Wank Relief” program. Through June of 2008, M5 owners may remove their cars’ M5 badges and replace them with complimentary self-stick W5 badges, as shown below. Poser indemnification insurance not included.
Who would want a BMW that will only last less than 200000 kms?
This will destroy BMW's reputation for reliability.Not saying that BMW are THAT much reliable right now say like Toyota but they still are not like British cars
Come on lets think reasonable
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