Is there a way to change the setting in my 2004 530? I'd like to be able to start it without having to press the break pedal. I know it sounds petty but I have 2 kids, one in a car seat. It takes some time to get him in his car seat and I'd like to be able to either have my passenger start it up and get the air going or just lean over and start it up before getting him settled.

I don't think so, BMW did this for safety reasons.

Having two kids is all the more reason to avoid defeating safety systems ... lots of people are killed or injured when cars are started or left running "in gear" and move out of control when not intended.

98% of the cars in this world dont have this "safety feature"

this is a dumb feature in a car equipped with an auto transmission, ESPECIALLY an electronic auto tranny. the safety features in this car are dumb, like the one where the car will THROW itself into park if the door is open. I have now seen a valet move my car and watch the car SLAM into park while doing 3-4 mph on more then one occasion.